How have you been?
You liked 11 photos on my Instagram yesterday,
Did you stop because my 12th pic is a #WCW?
That made me think unanistalk,
Hello, can you hear me?
Ni California (my childhood nickname),
Namiss vile ulikuwa unaniita Calif,
When we were young and free,
I am now older, just call me Frank. Nikuite Mama nani?
There is such a difference between us
I hear you have three kids..
Hello from Mauaaa!
To tell you, to send back, that teddy bear nilikupatiaaa
But when I call uko mteja,
Did you block my number,ama ulichange,
At least I can tell my current girlfriend I’ve tried,
To get that teddy bear back,
But it don’t matter. I clearly shouldn’t have told her about it..
[Two days later]
Hello, how are you?
Did you get my voicemail? I’m sorry
Nilikuona online Whatsapp,
Haki umeblock number yangu?
And it’s no secret that I am looking for a wife,
I am running out of time.
So hello from Mauaaaa (Maua)
Niko base nachew miraaaa! (Miraa)
Najua, utaniita mbuzi, lakini sijali (sijali)
But seriously nitakutumia Njuri Ncheke,
Pick up the phone nikwambie,
Nitakununulia teddy bear nyingine unipatie hiyo,
Nilipewa na grandma,
It matters. Clearly I was in love with you when I gave it to you.
(High, highs, highry, handas)
(Nimekosa low za kuweka hapa)
Hello from Mauaaa
I must have done this better than Jimmy Gaiiiit
Lakini, najua, ya Dela iko juu,
But when I did this nothing was on my miiiind,
Hello,I know I know this post doesn’t make sense,
At least I can say that I’ve tried (I’ve tried)
To say things that never came from my heart
But it don’t matter. I have done this post and I won’t delete it.
Seriously, though. Even that ‘album cover’ up there is nonsense.